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Letter "J" » Jerry Lewis Quotes
«The Doc told me I had a dual personality. Then he lays an 82 dollar bill on me, so I give him 41 bucks and say, 'Get the other 41 bucks from the other guy.'»
«I've had great success being a total idiot.»
«People hate me because I am a multifaceted, talented, wealthy, internationally famous genius.»
«When I sit back and think a little more rationally, I realize my life is half, so I must learn to do things halfway. I just have to learn to try to be good at being a half a person ... and get on with my life.»
«Pity? You don't want to be pitied because you're a cripple in a wheelchair? Stay in your house!»
«I am probably the most selfish man you will ever meet in your life. No one gets the satisfaction or the joy that I get out of seeing kids realize there is hope.»
«I get paid for what most kids get punished for.»
«My door is always open to any member who wishes to build consensus on reducing unnecessary spending. My preference is to consider any proposal in a thoughtful, deliberate manner rather than reading about it in the newspaper.»
«Every man?s dream is to be able to sink into the arms of a woman without also falling into her hands.»
«A woman doing comedy doesn't offend me, but sets me back a bit, ... I, as a viewer, have trouble with it. I think of her as a producing machine that brings babies in the world.»