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Letter "W" » W. C. Fields Quotes
«Women are like elephants. I like to look at 'em, but I wouldn't want to own one.»
«I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.»
«Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.»
«Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.»
«I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.»
«Children should neither be seen or heard from -- ever again.»
«Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.»
«Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.»
«I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.»
«It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.»